Do you and your dog have the perfect relationship?
No matter how unconditionally you love him and how much he loves you, it might be time to change how you view your dog—his successes, his failures, his behaviors—in order to have a much healthier and more rewarding bond with man’s best friend. Or, as we always say around #GCK9, to enjoy living life with your best friend!
If you want your dog to be happier and more secure, here are five things you can do to reinvent your relationship:
1. Stop focusing on what your dog does.
When we focus only on what our dogs do (their good and bad behaviors), we may end up punishing them for things that they do simply because they are scared or anxious.
How would you feel if you were yelled at every time you did something because you were frightened? You would probably feel even more frightened and deeply confused. This unsettles a dog and fractures your relationship with him. You want your dog to feel loved and secure, right?
The best way to do this is to stop focusing on what his bad behaviors are and start focusing instead on why he might be doing those things.
Is he acting out because he’s left home alone too frequently? Does he bark and snap at other dogs because he is anxious in new situations and around new people? Getting to the bottom of why your dog is doing something you don’t want him to do is the much better way of righting the situation.
2. Make sure your relationship is a reciprocal one.
How often do you let your dog do what he wants to do? Or are you always dictating where you go and what you do? Just like in any relationship, it has to go both ways. Your dog already has to be a part of the human world and your dog is more than happy to let you be the leader, but if you are a dictator, rather than just a leader, you are going to start to see him retreat in on himself. What can you do to make sure your dog is happy in your relationship? Make sure that the adventures that you go on together are not obligatory.
Be sure to make time for him whenever you can. He should never be an afterthought or an annoyance to you. Your dog should be a part of your life, given the time, care, and attention that he deserves.
3. Get him the training he needs.
Dogs that have experienced the best dog training are allowed much more freedom than dogs without any training. When you know that you can rely on your dog to come when he’s called (either because it’s time to go or because you need to remove him from a dangerous situation) and be a polite member of society, he can spend more time off of his leash. If he doesn’t lunge at your plates and try to steal your food, you can have him hang out around the dinner table without worrying he’ll be aggressive about the meal.
Training also greatly reduces your frustration as an owner, as he will drop things he’s told to drop, grab things he’s told to grab, and go where you ask him to go, without needing to be told twice. A dog with proper training understands what you are asking him to do, which means he’ll experience far less confusion when you ask him to do something. And as we all know, clear communication is key in any relationship.
4. Stay calm and carry on.
If you often become frustrated with your dog, especially if he is still learning the right behaviors, you are probably confusing and frightening your dog. Losing your temper can be damaging to human relationships, so why wouldn’t it be equally damaging in your relationship with your dog. In addition, your dog takes his cues from you. If he’s feeling that you are stressed out or afraid, he’ll get stressed out and afraid, too. If you stay calm, however, he’ll stay calm too. This is essential to keeping him happy and unafraid.
5. Learn about your dog and how he communicates.
It’s not just important for your dog to understand your communication—it’s also vitally important that you understand what he’s trying to say to you. Learning as much as you can about canine body language and facial expressions, especially those that are connected with anger, stress, fear, and aggression, can help keep your dog safe.
You’ll be able to easily identify situations in which he feels uncomfortable or threatened, so you can remove him from those situations.
As you learn to read the signs that he’s sending you, he will feel much more comfortable, knowing that you’ll keep him safe and happy, even if he can’t open his mouth and say, “Hey, I’m not comfortable in this situation.” This is also a great way to learn about your dog’s likes and dislikes. Once you know his preferences, you’ll be able to get the food, treats, and toys that he loves the most.